Be Brave and Want me back Naomi Campbell Diary
by Lovingannabelle110
Summary: I own nothing purely for fun i will get back to my other story soon been very busy : This one is a one off maybe might carry on if people wanna read more from Naomi's Diary. This entry is when Naomi realises she loves Emily x
1. “Be brave and want me back”

"_**Be brave and want me back"**_

_**Dear Diary – I think I've lost her forever…**_

"Be brave and want me back" is all that is going round and round in my head right now. The pain in her voice when she said it made my heart seize up, I was a horrible person to walk away from her but I'm so scared no I'm terrified. I know recently my entries have been about a certain twin and how my head is very confused but this entry is tearing me up inside. My eyes haven't been dry since walking away from the one person that makes me happy. Happy, listen to me. I am such an idiot, why did I walk away from someone who makes me happy? Why didn't I turn back around and run into her arms and tell her how I really feel? I'll tell you why and it's pathetic really but I don't think I'm good enough for her and I'm scared that I'll break her heart, more than I already have… Yes you read it right Naomi Campbell is scared. I've never felt like this before **EVER **I'm not used to opening up to people, I mean Naomi doesn't need friends – she doesn't want friends, she does fine without them, but this time I really think I've fucked up : ( You know yesterday I wrote about Emily staying over and how I freaked myself out because I went to stroke her hair, because truth be told she looked so peaceful sleeping that it was like I had no control over my arm, it just had to feel the softness of her hair. I scared myself, there's that word again. Why does she scare me so **much???** So I left her in my bed and went to college early. She caught up with me and told me she got the message and she'd manage. I hated that because I didn't intend to give off any message, me leaving her was just me running away from how I was feeling. I don't think I realised what I was feeling until Cook said "getting your girlfriend to hold your hand." I ran off after that, leaving Emily yet again. I went to Kerian in floods of tears making out it was Cook but I think the tears were because of the word 'girlfriend' it freaked me out I'm not gay or am I?? Kerian kissed me it was horrible, like seriously he's old enough to be my **Dad! **I ran home in tears after that thinking all I wanted to do was run into Emily's arms but I couldn't, I didn't want to admit to myself that I might actually be falling in love with her. Besides after leaving her twice in a day and telling her to leave me alone I don't think she'd wanna see me.

But I was wrong she did want to see me and this is where we get to the reason this entry is tearing me up inside. I fell asleep not last night but the night before after crying myself to sleep and holding a note Emily had left me in my bed, it was so sweet it read '_Emily Slept Here : )' _see how nice she is after I've been a total bitch to her. So I woke up and the note was stuck to my cheek I smiled and took it off, went over to the mirror and you guessed it, EMILY had rubbed off on my cheek. I started to rub it off but then something hit me **don't leave her again** so I did something brave. I picked up the phone and pressed speed dial 1, yes I know she's the first person on my speed dial but she's the first person I turn to **always**. I asked her if we could go somewhere, anywhere and we went to the lake. It was so funny watching her cycle she is so cute trying to keep her balance. Eeeek look I'm giving it away so bad that she's got a hold on me. Anyways we were standing by the lake and she started undressing I literally was like staring and I swear she knew what she was doing, little flirt. I did the whole innocent 'I didn't bring a swimming costume' I knew she didn't I was there when she packed her bag she was so trying to get a reaction out of me. So I played along I turned my back and took off my clothes telling her not to look. I knew exactly what I was doing and writing this now I don't understand why I'm in my room writing in a stupid diary and not with Emily. I knew she'd look it was all a game, pushing her into the lake was fun. I jumped in after, it was bloody freezing. So yeah it started to get dark and we were sitting drinking and Emily was lighting up a splif then she rested her hand on mine. I'm not kidding my whole body twinged, like an electric pulse had just been sent through me. I managed to smile and then she asked to do blowbacks I didn't want to sound stupid so made out I thought they were crap even though I'd never tried them. And that was the start of the shit I'm in now, after the blowback our eyes just locked together. In that moment I forgot everything, all my fears and just closed my eyes and listened to my heart. I leant in and kissed her I know what your thinking **I KISSED HER **up until then it was always her kissing me and me running away but this time I listened to what my heart desired. The kiss started off soft and gentle but then the kiss intensified, I couldn't help it I moaned and longed for more but then came the scared Naomi and I started to push her back. This was the point she placed tiny kisses on my neck, which made me feel all funny in a certain place. I stopped her and we just stared at each other. 'say something' I said and her response was 'I'm all about experiments me' so with the added help of being slightly high and drunk I did something I **never ever** thought I would do. The kisses became intensified, hands were everywhere, clothes were coming off and in that moment everything else didn't matter all that mattered was Emily. Yeah you guessed it my first time **EVER** and it was with **a girl**. I know I made out I'd had cock to Emily but it was all lies. Thinking about it now we were each others first and that's defiantly something to smile about : ) But I'm sitting here crying alone in my room because again here's that word, I got **scared**. I stupidly walked away from her left her near the lake, why didn't I turn around. So now I sit here with 'be brave and want me back' running round and round in my head. The word **brave** stands out, Emily knows me more than I realise, I need to be brave I need to see her. OMG I think I'm finally admitting it to myself. I do need somebody, want somebody I want Emily. I want to feel her skin against mine again and feel the warmth between us, I need too hear that husky sexy voice OK I admit it I need her. I've got to go tell her now, I need her to know how I feel I need to tell her that I love Emily Fitch.

Wish me luck

Naomi xoxox


	2. “You Ladies like to wriggle, don’t you?”

"_**You Ladies like to wriggle, don't you?"**_

_**Dear Diary – I've fallen hard for this girl…**_

Sorry haven't written in here for days, kind of had other things to be doing and by things I mean a certain cute red head that's totally got a hold on me. I mean Naomi doesn't need anyone, yeah that's out of the window. Naomi needs Emily. I literally can't be without her. This has been the first night without her since my last entry and I actually miss her, only left her an hour ago. Eeek I really have fallen hard for this girl, big change from my last entry. I mean I still don't know if I'm gay, it could be just an Emily thing not a gay thing but we'll see – at the moment all that matters is me and her and how I've got to make sure I don't break her heart : (

Ok so where did I leave you last? Oh yeah I was gunna go tell her I loved her, well **LOVE **is easier to write then say but I told her I **do **want someone, **need** someone and that when I'm with her I feel **happier** less alone, less lonely. This was all said through a door and through tears streaming down my face. I felt awful that I had made her cry. That hurt me so much. She told me she wasn't going to open the door because she'd been crying and her eyes were all puffy. Hearing her say that made my heart clench, I think I realised then that I wanted to make her happy not sad. So I sat down and poured out my heart and tears, literally. I wanted a hug so bad; to hold her, feel her, smell her but there was a door between us. To me it was like a barrier and I wanted to break it down, then she did the cutest thing ever that if anyone was watching from across the street they would of thought we were mental. She took hold of my hand through the cat flap. I know right how cute is that, I just held on to her and rested my head on the door and let the tears roll down my face. We sat like that for a while and then I was** brave** (think that's gunna be my new word from now on instead of **scared**) and asked if she wanted to stay at mine. I don't know how I could tell but I think that made her smile because she let go of my hand and opened the door. She hugged me and I held her so tight, (you have no idea how good it feels to hug Emily Fitch, it is intoxicating). So she went and grabbed an over night bag and we walked hand in hand back to mine in silence with the occasional smile at each other. We didn't need words we knew exactly how each other was feeling. When we got to mine my mum was up, yeah tell me about it, why wasn't she in bed? LOL anyways mum knows me better than anyone else and just before I went to see Emily she told me a story about how I'd made her really happy and that sometimes the people who make us happy are **never **the people **we expect**. When she opened the door and smiled at me I knew exactly who she was referring to when she told me that story, Emily was the person who would make me happy and I think my mum knew that before me. So yeah cringe moment, mum hugged Emily and whispered something in her ear that made Emily smile. Emily looked my way and smiled reminding me that my mum was a nice cliché. Emily wouldn't tell me what my mum told her but something tells me Emily and my mum may have had more then just a hello that morning I left her in my bed and ran off scared to college.

So yeah after mum made us both a hot chocolate with marshmallows we headed up to bed. I love my mum, I didn't realise how cool she'd be over her only daughter falling in love with a girl but from how my mum's been acting I think she rather likes Emily. Makes it easier to be more relaxed if I know she's cool with it. God this entry is gunna be long but so much has happened : ) didn't sleep a wink that night, as soon as I closed the bedroom door Emily pinned me up against it and smirked. I'm not kidding that was enough to make me umm wet so you can imagine what happened when she started to kiss me. I've never felt anything like it and I was actually happy, I'd let myself be happy and I was glad because god miss Fitch is a good kisser. Wasn't gunna let her have all the fun though I managed to move her over to the bed and pin her down hehe looking at her was breathtaking she seriously is beautiful with her cute button nose and those captivating eyes. I just couldn't resist I licked my bottom lip, watched her bite hers and kissed her. Her lips against mine just feel so, how do I put it? Meant to be. And when her tongue brushed across my lips asking for entry, it was so intense all I could do was moan. Feeling her body against mine… ok I think I need to stop writing about it I'm turning myself on LOL lets just say we literally had mind blowing sex all the way through the night : )

The next day at college I couldn't keep my eyes off her and Effy noticed. She knew straight away summit was going on between us but for Emz sake I told her to keep it on the low until we figure out how to deal with Katie. Yeah Emily's twin hates me but you know that I've written about it in many entries dating back to middle school. Katie arranged a trip for us all to go camping, I was surprised I was actually invited the whole way there Effy kept smirking at us. Was hard in the car keeping my hands off her but I wasn't ready to tell and I don't think Emily was either. The trip its self was freaky these weird hunter guys were trying to scare us by ramming us off the road. For a minute I was actually freaking out and I grabbed Emily's hand I wanted her to know I'd keep her safe. Thomas noticed and sent a smile my way, which I returned it was nice to see people approved of our relationship. The tent arrangements were funny you could tell Katie had arranged them; her and Freddie were together, Pandora and Thomas, Effy was alone and then there was me, Emily and JJ. Yeah tell me about it 3 in a tent when Effy had one all to herself but it was almost like Katie wanted Effy to be alone and she defiantly didn't want me alone with Emily, in Katie's eyes I was a big dyke. JJ bless him was oblivious to the fact that Emily and me were together, he totally didn't get the looks I kept giving her I think he got very confused. Anyways when JJ finally fell asleep we went for a walk, it was so peaceful in the woods at night and the stars were beautiful. It was a beautiful night to be walking with oo I dunna know can I say my girlfriend yet or is that to soon?? We found a spot away from the camp site and laid down on a blanket looking up at the stars. Emily laid her head on my chest, I had my arms wrapped tight around her. We lay there what seemed like hours just gazing at the stars. She tilted her head so our eyes met and told me how beautiful I looked. I laughed, me beautiful I don't think so – she was the beautiful one. She silenced me by placing her lips on mine, just one touch and it was like poison running all the way through my body that my body started to shake. What she said next made me feel a slight pang in my heart "Your not gunna run away again are you?" it hurt to hear but I think the woods brought back memories of the lake and she had every right to ask. I sat up and held her hand tight, looking her in the eyes I smiled and said "never again" yeah I know right that was pretty commitmenty of me, I meant it at the time and I really don't want to be without her. My words made her eyes water and I wiped the tears off her cheek and lent in for a kiss. The kiss intensified and I couldn't resist I laid her back down on the blanket and stroked her legs slowly up and down. Thing with Miss Fitch is, she doesn't like being on bottom, she flipped me over whilst taking off my top – this girl has skills I'm telling you. It was only fair that her top came off too so I pulled hers off and the second it was over her head her lips came crashing down on mine. I let out a moan her touch, her sent everything about her just drives me crazy. It wasn't long until she had managed to take my skirt off and before I could take hers off her hands were working their magic and I couldn't do anything but moan and bite my tongue to stop myself from screaming.

The mornings used to be my least favourite time Naomi and mornings do not go together but waking up in Emily's arms makes them so more enjoyable. This might sound creepy but watching her sleep made me smile, she looked so peaceful and innocent. I kissed her forehead and she stirred, seeing her open her eyes and me being the first thing she sees made me feel so special. I think you can all tell I've fallen very very hard for this girl. We had to get back to the tent before the others woke up and JJ realised we weren't between him anymore. We managed it just and I'll never forget the first thing JJ said to us when he woke up "You ladies like to wriggle, don't you?" oh the sweet innocence of JJ yes we do in deed like to wriggle more then he'll ever know LOL.


End file.
